Celebrities

Robert Downey Jr. Is Lucky to Have ‘Sane’ Wife for 18 Years – She Set Rules to Save Their Relationship

Robert Downey Jr. is known for his appearances in some of the biggest films in the industry like “Iron Man” and “Oppenheimer.” However, his journey and reputation in the industry have taken a few hits. Fortunately, Robert met his wife Susan who helped end his drug addiction for good.

Robert Downey Jr. is an award-winning actor whose name is often associated with the biggest stars in Hollywood. He has been part of major productions such as “Iron Man,” “Sherlock Holmes,” and recently, “Oppenheimer.”

However, alongside being counted among the greatest actors in the industry, his name has also been linked to his struggle with drugs and multiple relapses. Robert’s introduction to drugs began at a young age when he shared his first joint with his father at eight.

Robert Downey Jr. at the Writer's Guild of America Awards in Beverly Hills in 1991 | Source: Getty Images

His mother struggled with alcoholism for a long time. But when the actor started making strides in his career, such as his Oscar nomination for “Chaplin,” he hit rock bottom when he drove down Sunset Boulevard naked.

Robert Downey Jr. at the premiere of "Restoration" in New York in 1991 | Source: Getty Images

The actor was then arrested for trespassing after entering a stranger’s house and falling asleep on a child’s bed. That was not the end of his problems. In 1999, he failed to appear in court and was sentenced to three years in California state prison. He served almost a year and, fortunately, landed an acting job on “Ally McBeal.”

Robert Downey, Jr. photographed in 1992 | Source: Getty Images
As much as it seemed like the actor was getting back on track, he was arrested again in Palm Springs, where he was found with three bags of cocaine, a loaded gun, and a Wonder Woman costume. These behaviors led to his removal from “Ally McBeal,” and he was written off as a lost cause by David E. Kelley.
Susan and Robert Downey Jr. at "The Singing Detective" Premiere in New York in 2003 | Source: Getty Images

However, one person came into Robert’s life and inspired him to better himself: his wife, Susan Downey. Susan is a producer known for films like “The Book of Eli” and “Sherlock Holmes.” The couple had different upbringings: Susan was a dedicated student in Chicago, raised by her businessman father and a hands-on mother who was on a PTA board. She eventually graduated summa cum laude from USC.

Robert Downey Jr. and wife Susan in Beverly Hills in 2011 | Source: Getty Images
On the flip side, Robert grew up in Hollywood and dropped out of high school. His director father put him in front of the camera at five in one of his underground films. But despite their differences, the two ended up in the same industry and met on the set of the thriller “Gothika,” which Susan was producing. The film starred Halle Berry, but the producer wanted to set clear boundaries and did not want to have any romantic connection with anyone on set.
Susan and actor Robert Downey Jr. in California in 2013 | Source: Getty Images

Nonetheless, when the set crew went out for lunch, Susan recalled that Halle and the director joined them, but her first encounter with who would end up being her husband was very peculiar. While everyone ordered Japanese food, Robert brought out oatmeal and started raving about how much a superfood it was. He also brought a variety of herbs and started doing yoga poses. “I mean, he was interesting but weird,” recalled Susan.

Eventually, Susan gave Robert a chance and accepted his marriage proposal, on the condition that it would be a long engagement. The producer insisted that Robert should first give up drugs completely, and should he relapse, then she would leave.

However, Susan, 50, admitted that she did not know much about how difficult it was to battle addiction. “Addiction was so foreign to me. I was incredibly ignorant of the hold it had on people,” she expressed.

Robert Downey Jr. and Susan Downey at Screen Actors Guild Awards in California in 2024 | Source: Getty Images

Robert Downey Jr. and Susan Downey at Screen Actors Guild Awards in California in 2024 | Source: Getty Images

Robert loved that his wife was not familiar with the darkness of addiction. “If she knew the depths of my depravity, we would not be sitting here,” he admitted. The two then got married two years after their engagement in August 2005, in the Hamptons.

As one of the longest-standing couples in Hollywood, the couple has set rules on how to maintain a healthy marriage that works with their demanding schedules. Susan and Robert promised never to spend more than two weeks apart. Even when traveling, they always tried to find a way to cohabit. However, they found more opportunities to work together with Robert bringing his wife along on “Iron Man 2” and the comedy “Due Date.”

Robert Downey Jr. | Source: Instagram.com/Robert Downey Jr

Robert Downey Jr. | Source: Instagram.com/Robert Downey Jr

The more time they spent working together, especially after starting their production company, “Team Downey,” they reduced their two-week rule to a one-week rule. “Our feeling was, if we wanted to spend time together, have a life together, then we should just go ahead and make movies together,” said Susan Downey.

Robert recently won a SAG award for his performance in “Oppenheimer” and mentioned a list of actors that had been monumental in his career, but at the end of it, he had his wife’s name. He joked and thanked her for making it look like it was easy to be married to an actor of his caliber. Then he ended his speech by thanking his children, Indio, Exton, and daughter Avri Roel Downey.

Susan Downey at Screen Actors Guild Awards in California in 2024 | Source: Getty Images

Susan Downey at Screen Actors Guild Awards in California in 2024 | Source: Getty Images

Fans loved that Robert kept his speech funny as usual and pointed out how much they loved his wife, “One can always count on a witty speech from RDJ. Susan sure is amazing & they are a lovely couple. Congrats to RDJ for his well-deserved win!” remarked a fan. While another added, “They are such a lovely couple. Congrats to RDJ for his well-deserved win!”

Robert Downey Jr. and his wife Susan | Source: Instagram.com/Robert Downey Jr

Robert Downey Jr. and his wife Susan | Source: Instagram.com/Robert Downey Jr

Fans also loved how much Robert always spoke fondly of his wife, “The way Robert Downey Jr. talks about his wife gets me every single time. He loves that woman, and she definitely helped craft him into the man he is today. Susan Downey, you are amazing!!!” remarked another fan.

The actor also shared a photo of him and his wife from the SAG Awards and thanked the organization for acknowledging the film. He shared another picture from the BAFTA award ceremony with his wife expressing how appreciative he was for the recognition of the cinematic work in “Oppenheimer.”

In another sweet Instagram post, Robert Downey Jr. shared a quirky picture of him and his wife, highlighting how much he loved that his wife handled his playful character, he wrote, “To she who lovingly tolerates my many shenanigans, I pledge my undying love.” After 18 years, the couple’s love is still in “bloom.”